Sketch #1

Does anyone agree with me that it would be helpful if the armies of the nations of the World wore more distinctive uniforms, like our football teams? Few if any incorporate stripes, let alone hoops and they need an away kit for when they are invading someone else’s country and the two strips clash. Get Nike involved, get a swoosh on those desert boots, and get Addidas to design the UN’s kit. And have advertising on the jackets - they already have the soldiers names in small text on the front, put 'em on the back in bold where the TV audience can see them. Get them in the stores, replica uniforms in kid sizes – support your favourite soldier. Be useful in films too, where every shaven headed killing machine looks pretty much the same as another. I watched Thin Red Line recently and I couldn't tell a Corporate right from a Private wrong. Get some serious sponsorship deals in place too, that way pensions could be guaranteed and we could go back to having bigger armies which would mean better wars, but with their own kit sponsored by, well if you want irony on a World scale then Coke adds life or perhaps the more homely 'we're the Marines and we're lovin' it'.